How to Check in on a Mate – A Guide to Support

Checking in on a mate isn't just about asking if they're OK; it's about being genuinely interested in their well-being and ready to offer support. In a fast-paced world, it's easy to miss the signs that someone might be struggling. Here's a guide to help you effectively check in on your friends and colleagues and provide the support they need.

  1. Recognise the Signs: Be aware of the signs that someone might be struggling, such as changes in behaviour, mood swings, withdrawal from social activities, or talking about feeling hopeless. Other indicators can include a decline in work performance, increased absenteeism, or noticeable changes in appearance. Being observant and empathetic can help you identify when someone might need support.

  2. Start the Conversation: Initiate the conversation in a non-confrontational and supportive manner. You might say, "I've noticed you seem a bit down lately. Is everything OK?" Approach them with kindness and without assumptions. Your goal is to create a safe space where they feel comfortable opening up about their feelings.

  3. Listen Actively: When your mate opens up, listen without interrupting. Show empathy and understanding, and avoid offering solutions unless asked. Use active listening techniques such as nodding, maintaining eye contact, and repeating back what they've said to show that you understand. Validate their feelings by acknowledging their emotions and experiences.

  4. Offer Support: Ask how you can help. Sometimes, just being there to listen is enough. Encourage them to seek professional help if needed and offer to accompany them. Suggest practical steps they can take to improve their situation, such as contacting a mental health professional, joining a support group, or practising self-care activities. Let them know that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

  5. Follow Up: Checking in isn't a one-time thing. Follow up regularly to see how they're doing and remind them that you're there for them. Send a message or give them a call to let them know you’re thinking of them. Consistent follow-up shows that you genuinely care and are committed to supporting them through their journey.

Supporting a friend in need can make a significant difference in their life. By recognising the signs, starting a supportive conversation, listening actively, offering practical support, and following up, you can help your mate navigate through tough times. Remember, it’s the small acts of kindness and support that can have the most profound impact.

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